A woman picks up a pineapple at a fruit stand.
Man: Don't do it. That one's overripe.
Woman: Really? You can tell?
Man: Trust me. This is the one.
The man hands the woman a different pineapple.
Man: Sweet and firm.
Woman: I like sweet. And I like firm.
The man and woman make eyes at each other and a body falls from the sky into the fruit stand next to them. The woman screams.
In the break room, Castle sees Ryan chugging a green liquid.
Castle: Ugh, ah! What are you drinking? Toxic waste?
Jenny: We're doing a cleanse. And he forgot his bottle, so I came by to drop it off.
Castle: Oh, he forgot it. Are… Are you sure?
Ryan: Mm. Actually, I've never felt better in my entire life. Water, lime juice, no solid food. Jenny and I are gonna start our marriage perfectly cleansed.
Jenny: We've already made it a week. We only have three days to go.
Beckett: I can't even believe you guys are already getting married on Sunday.
Jenny: I know, isn't that crazy? I better run; my mom is freaking out about place cards. See you there.
Ryan: Thanks, sweetie. I love you.
Jenny: I love you more.
Ryan: That's not possible.
Ryan and Jenny kiss. Jenny leaves.
Ryan: I know, I know, I know, we're nauseating.
Esposito: Well, I am looking forward to meeting some of Jenny's sorority sisters. I'm about to show them some of New York's finest.
Ryan: Good, then I guess you won't care that Lanie's bringing a plus one.
Esposito: Who?
Ryan: Uh, I don't know. She just RSVPed “plus one”.
Esposito: How can? How can she already have a boyfriend? We just broke up.
Beckett: Don't worry, Espo, I'm going alone, so if the sorority girls don't work out, I'll dance with you.
Esposito's cell phone rings.
Esposito: Esposito.
Esposito walks off to take the call.
Ryan: Castle, Jenny tells me that you RSVPed plus one.
Castle: Mm-hmm.
Beckett: You're bringing a date?
Castle: I am.
Beckett: Who?
Castle: Oh, well, she's beautiful, she's intelligent, she's funny. The way she smiles at me, sometimes just melts my heart. It's Alexis.
Esposito returns.
Esposito: Guys, we got a fresh one.
In the street.
Beckett: Hey, Lanie, we got a jumper?
Lanie: Judging by the impact, I'd say he came from one of those windows above the seventh floor. Ryan and Esposito already into finding the room with the hotel staff.
Castle: So... He's naked.
Lanie: Perceptive.
Castle: Well, it is pretty cold out. If this was a suicide, wouldn't you rather be warm and toasty on your way down to your certain yet citrusy death?
Lanie: If it were suicide, would you really have these?
Lanie lifts the body to show scratches on the man's back.
Lanie: Fingernail marks, only an hour old.
Beckett: Well, looks like he did the deed before taking the dive.
Castle: Last item on your bucket list?
Esposito: Yo. Two hotel clerks saw a white lady with long, red hair hurrying out shortly after birthday suit hit the fruit.
Beckett: All right, see if you can get a better description from those clerks and let's set up a canvass. We gotta find that woman.
Lanie: Antonio, can you refrigerate these samples in the van, please?
Esposito: Is this the guy?
Beckett: Hmm?
Esposito: Mr. Plus One!
Antonio walks off with the samples and Esposito stares after him.
Ryan: Hey, Beckett! Found the room! 8th floor!
Beckett: Okay!
Bolero is playing as they enter the hotel room.
Castle: Music to set the mood by?
Beckett: Yeah. And then there's the lipstick on the pillow.
Castle: Looks like Lanie was right about our victim getting lucky before he ran out of luck.
Ryan: So, our vic's name is Michael Bailey, 28. Lives in West 93rd Street, and according to his business card, he's a junior analyst at Global Twelve Consolidated in Midtown.
Beckett: Who booked the room?
Ryan: Booked under Jane Eyre. Paid with cash. No credit card on file.
Castle: Suggests premeditation. She knew she was gonna kill him, so she booked the room anonymously.
Beckett: Yeah, but then why sleep with him? Why not just push him out the window?
Castle: Because...she's a black widow.
Beckett turns off the iPod playing Bolero.
Castle: Coldest hearted creature on earth. She lures an unsuspecting male, takes him into her web, and then the moment they culminate, as soon as he feels the ecstasy of achieving his biological destiny, she opens up her jaws and eats him alive.
Beckett purses her lips in amusement. Ryan turns to Beckett.
Ryan: I'm glad I'm in a healthy relationship.
Beckett: Yeah.
Castle: I bet make black widow spiders think they're in healthy relationships, too.
Beckett: Well, black widow or not, I think I figured out how we can find her.
Beckett picks up a wine glass that has fingerprints on it.
Beckett: Bingo.
In the interrogation room.
Holly Franklin: Do you have any idea who I am? I'm a founding partner of Keller, Braun, and Franklin. I'm Franklin.
Beckett: Okay, well, I don't care about your law firm. A man fell to his death tonight and fingerprints confirm that you were at the crime scene.
Holly Franklin: No, I had nothing to do with it.
Beckett: Okay, maybe you can tell me why people saw you fleeing the crime scene.
Ms. Franklin realizes she's been caught.
Beckett: Ms. Franklin, Evidence suggests that you and Michael...
Holly Franklin: Michael?
Beckett :... Bailey were romantically involved.
Holly Franklin: Michael who?
Beckett places a photo on the table.
Beckett: This man.
Holly Franklin: No, that's not Michael, that's Jake. That's Jake Hendricks.
Beckett: No, that's Michael Bailey.
Holly Franklin: Uh, I think I would know who I was sleeping with.
Beckett: Well, apparently you don't.
In the observation room.
Esposito: You think I should pull her phone records?
Ryan: Nah, what's the point? We already have her at the hotel with our victim.
Ryan takes a swig of the cleansing juice.
Esposito: Not her. Lanie.
Ryan chokes on his drink.
Ryan: What?
Esposito: I'm not gonna go to your wedding without knowing who this guy is.
Ryan: Jenny has to find out for the place cards... I'll get you his name.
Esposito: Okay.
In the interrogation room.
Holly Franklin: He told me his name was Jake. Um, he said that he flies in from Chicago to make sales calls for his family business. He was really sweet. I didn't kill him. I was falling in love with him.
Beckett: Well, he fell pretty hard, too. So, how long were the two of you dating?
Holly Franklin: Ahem, uh, well… We, uh… We actually... Just... Met... Tonight, um, at Willmar's Bar at around seven.
Beckett: Tonight? And...you were... Already falling in love with him?
Holly Franklin: Look, I… I know… I know it sounds crazy, but it felt like one of those magical connections that you read about, you know? After we...you know... Um, he started to get dizzy and sweaty, so he opened up a window to get some fresh air and he was leaning against the window sill, when suddenly... He just...
Franklin makes a tumbling motion with her hand.
Beckett: Okay. So, you're saying that... He fell out the window and your first instinct wasn't to call 9-1-1, but to run away.
Holly Franklin: I knew how it would look, but I panicked, and I made a really bad decision. But I swear it was an accident.
In the autopsy room.
Lanie: It was not an accident.
Castle: You could tell he was pushed?
Lanie: I didn't say he was pushed. Michael Bailey was poisoned with a lethal dose of coltrasine. He was dead before he hit the fruit.
Castle: Coltrasine. Isn't that a drug for rheumatism?
Lanie: Yes, which Bailey does not have. But he had 50 times the normal dosage in his system. I'm putting the time of ingestion between 4 and 6 PM.
Castle: Which is 45 minutes before Holly said she met him at Willmar's bar.
Beckett: Any idea how that drug was delivered?
Lanie: It was in something he drank. I found lots of way protein isolate in his stomach along with chocolate.
Castle: So, a chocolate protein shake.
Lanie: It'd be sweet enough to make the taste of the drug.
Castle: Speaking of sweet, who's your date for Ryan's wedding?
Lanie glares at Castle.
Castle: …
Beckett: All right, thanks, Lanie.
Lanie: One more thing. I ran a DNA test just to confirm that superman here had sex before dying.
Beckett: No, it's okay. Our suspect…
Lanie: Let me finish! The test shows he had sex, all right. With two different women within hours of his death.
Castle: You dog.
In the hallway.
Ryan: Ms. Franklin, i… It seems that you weren't the only woman that… That Mr. Bailey was, uh... With in the hours prior to his death.
Holly Franklin: Um, what you mean “with”?
Ryan: Was there another woman in the hotel room with you?
Holly Franklin: I didn't think could get any more humiliating.
Ryan: Was that a yes?
Holly Franklin: No, Detective.
Ryan: Thank you. Oh, and you should know that our M.E. has been able to determine that Mr. Bailey was, uh, wearing a condom both times, so that's...
Holly Franklin: That makes it all better.
Holly gives Ryan an angry look and he walks away. Holly calls after him.
Holly Franklin: Now I wished I pushed him!
Ryan: Hell hath no fury, all right, but I'm pretty sure she's telling the truth.
Beckett: Yeah, maybe. But let's just confirm her alibi before releasing her.
Castle: In the mean time, we need to figure out where Bailey was and who he was with between 4 and 6 PM when he was poisoned.
Beckett: Exactly. That is our kill zone.
Beckett writes “KILL ZONE” on the murder board. Ryan stares at the doughnut in Esposito's hand.
Esposito: Hey. So, I can't find any next of kin on the guy. Parents died years ago, there's no siblings, no nothing.
Ryan is entranced by the doughnut as Esposito takes a bite.
Esposito: You okay?
Ryan: Fine.
Ryan takes a swig of the lime juice.
Beckett: So, then everything Bailey told Holly about himself was a lie.
Castle: Maybe that was his shtick. In from out of town, family guy, own business. That's how he got women in bed.
Ryan: Whatever his reason for lying to Holly, I'm betting that our killer is whoever Bailey slept with earlier in the day. She got onto his philandering, got even.
Beckett: All right, go through his phone records. We got to find the other woman.
At Castle’s loft.
Alexis: Good morning, Dad.
Castle: Good morning.
Martha: Darling, where's your credit card?
Castle: Aw. I liked good morning better. Let me ask you two something. If you found out a man was cheating on you, how would you kill him?
Martha: Knife. To the heart.
Castle: All right, what if you don't have the stomach for that?
Alexis: Shoot him.
Castle: But you don't have the stomach for that either.
Martha: What's wrong with our stomachs?
Alexis: There's always poison.
Martha: True. Watch him writhe and suffer.
Alexis: Die like the rodent he is.
Castle: Wow. All these years writing about murderers, I had no idea I was living among them. Speaking of murder, what's the credit card for?
Alexis: Oh, we're going shopping to pick up my dress to be your date at Ryan's wedding.
Castle: What's wrong with the ones you have?
Alexis gives Castle a look.
Martha: Darling, beauty does not happen by accident.
Alexis: That's why when it goes unappreciated by cheating scum, we want revenge.
Alexis threatens Castle with a butter knife.
In the precinct.
Castle: Even their hypothetical fury is unnerving. William Congreve had it right when he talked about scorned women.
Beckett: Yeah, well, you haven't heard what I would do.
Castle: Yeah, I don't think I ever want to know.
They approach Ryan and Esposito.
Beckett: Hey guys, any luck tracking down Bailey's other woman?
Ryan: Uh...
Esposito: A lot of luck.
Esposito opens the interview room door and they enter to find well over a dozen hot women.
Castle: It's like the beginning of The Bachelor, but without the appletinis.
Beckett: Bailey was involved with all of them?
Ryan: Uh, yeah. And each of them thought that they were his one and only.
Castle: That's a lot of scorned women. And a lot of fury.
Near the bullpen.
Castle: Yeah. Yeah, I don't get it. H… How does an average-looking guy with a dime-a-dozen analyst job end up dating all of these gorgeous women?
Beckett: By lying to them.
Esposito: Actually, he wasn't lying to these women. At least not about who he was, anyway. They all knew him by his real name.
Castle: Then why would he tell Holly that he's Jake from Chicago?
Beckett: Was Bailey with any of those women between four and six yesterday?
Esposito: So far, no. But they all denied knowing that he was even in the city. A month ago, he told every one of them he was going to Europe for six weeks.
Castle: A month ago? So, why'd he come back early?
Esposito: He never went. And as far as I can tell from his credit card use, he never even left New York.
Beckett: So, why tell them that he was leaving? I mean, was that just a cowardly way of breaking up with them?
Esposito: I think there's something else going on. I called the personnel department at Global Twelve Consolidated, and they said that he's been on leave of absence for the last month.
Castle: That's a big month. Taking a leave from work and your girlfriends.
Ryan: And his apartment.
Ryan shakes some evidence bags.
Ryan: The doorman at Bailey's building said that for the past month, he's only spent a couple nights a week there.
Esposito: Past month.
Ryan: Yeah. Wasn't there at all yesterday, so that's not where he was poisoned. And I looked in his dresser and I found this.
Ryan pulls out a driver's license.
Ryan: Illinois driver's license.
Beckett: Jake Hendricks, Chicago. That's the name that he gave Holly.
Castle: So, he is Jake Hendricks?
Ryan: No, he's Mike Bailey. It's a fake.
Castle: He did not buy this on some street corner. This is government grade.
Ryan: Yeah, right down to the security hologram. It's like he was living under cover. And I found this.
Ryan holds up stacks of cash.
Esposito: That's a lot of cake.
Ryan: Why do you have to call it cake? I… It's money. It's a lot of money. It's about 60 grand.
Beckett: Cash, fake ID... The hell was Bailey into?
Castle: Something bigger than lying about who he was just to get laid. Jake Hendricks has fake web search hits.
Castle shows them the internet sites on his iPad.
Castle: Lives in Chicago. Works for the family business.
Esposito: Just like he told Holly Franklin.
Castle: Mm-hmm. Family business has a fake website.
Beckett: That's a pretty deep cover.
Castle: Yeah. Our Don Juan's starting to look more like Jason Bourne.
Beckett: All right, you guys get a hold of FBI and CIA and any other intelligence agency, see if he's one of theirs. Come on, Castle. Let's talk to Bailey's boss at Global Twelve Consolidated, find out why our vic took that leave of absence.
At Global Twelve Consolidated.
Seth Harris: We still need the estimates on thorium in India, and I would appreciate…
Secretary: Excuse me, Mr. Harris? Those detectives are here for you.
Beckett enters and shows her badge.
Seth Harris: You guys mind if we take a few minutes?
Ron Hill: No problem. We're still working up the financing terms on subordinated debt anyway.
Amy Kemp: Sure. It's not like these negotiations are going anywhere.
Seth Harris: Mike was a junior analyst in our acquisition department. He was a good kid, bright future.
Beckett: I understand that he took a leave of absence a month ago, did he give you a reason why?
Seth Harris: Personal issues. He didn't say why, but I could tell it was serious.
Castle: So, you have no idea why he would have a fake ID and $60,000 cash?
Seth Harris: No. But maybe it had something to do with that woman that tried to break in his office.
Beckett: Who was that?
Seth Harris: I don't know. She was gone before security got there.
Beckett: And who reported it?
In the hallway.
Amy Kemp: I had stepped out of negotiations to go to the restroom, and in the hallway I noticed a woman was trying to pick an office door lock using a wrench and an opened up paperclip. I assumed she had just locked herself out of her office, and joked that a key would work better. Well, she was startled and shoved me over and made a dash for the stairwell.
Beckett: Did you get a good look at her?
Amy Kemp: Yeah, and I told security. She was exotic, 30ish, dark wavy hair. She had on an overcoat, but it was open and she was wearing a pin with a star of David on it. I'm pretty sure it's the insignia from LL Airlines.
Esposito pulls up the exotic B&E woman on the computer.
Esposito: Name's Colette Roth. She's 27, she's been an LL flight attendant for three years, making the Tel Aviv JFK run twice a week.
Ryan: Intel agencies used to use flight attendants as spies, didn't they?
Esposito: Yeah, and get this, she's former Israeli military.
Ryan: Massad is famous for poisoning.
Esposito: Yeah, big time. Castle may not be that far off with his Jason Bourne theory.
Ryan's cell beeps.
Esposito: Uniforms are tracking her down now.
Ryan: Ahh. Jenny just texted me Lanie's plus one. Name is Toby Lang.
Esposito: What? All right. Let's check this punk out.
Esposito types the name into his computer. Toby Lang MD pops up.
Esposito: Doctor Toby Lang? The guy's the chief administrator at St. Samuel's Hospital. Big job.
Ryan: Lanie did her residency there, didn't she?
Esposito: Yeah.
Ryan: Good looking guy.
Esposito: Played college hoops at Kentucky? Groundbreaking cancer research, are you kidding me? Put me down for plus one.
Ryan: Jenny already did the tables.
Esposito shoots Ryan a look.
Ryan: What about her sorority sisters?
Esposito: Dude, I'm not showing up solo when she's bringing Captain America over here.
Esposito points to the screen.
Ryan: Okay. I'll talk to Jenny. But her mom is gonna need a name for that place card.
The phone rings.
Esposito: Esposito… Copy that.
Esposito hangs up.
Esposito: Colette Roth just checked in for a flight at JFK. Unis are picking her up now.
Ryan: All right.
In the interrogation room.
Colette Roth: I'm not a spy. I'm a flight attendant.
Beckett: Well, then maybe you can explain your relationship with Michael Bailey.
Colette Roth: We were soul mates.
Castle: Well, then I'm sure you'll be able to tell us where the two of you were yesterday between the hours of 4 and 6 PM.
Colette Roth: I was outside his apartment, waiting for him, but he never came.
Beckett: You had a very busy day yesterday. You were seen trying to break into his office just hours before that.
Colette Roth: I was hoping to find some kind of clue, something that might lead me to his enemies.
Castle: His enemies?
Colette Roth: Michael was a hunted man.
Beckett: Hunted? By who?
Colette Roth: I don't know. I just know he was in trouble. Four weeks ago, he said he was going to Europe, but I kept seeing him in the city, and he kept pretending not to notice me. So, I staked out his apartment.
Castle: So, you stalked him.
Colette Roth: "Staked", "stalked", what's the difference? I was looking out for him! But he wasn't coming home. Then, a few days ago, I finally confronted him. He said he couldn't talk, but he told me to meet him the next day and he'd explain everything.
Beckett: Let me guess...that was the last time you saw him.
Colette Roth: No. We met the next day. But before he could tell me what was going on, this car came out of nowhere and they were on us.
Castle: Who?
Colette Roth: Ruffians in ski masks. They grabbed him and threw him in the back. I fought with all of my strength! But it was in vain.
Beckett: Betcha did.
Castle: Did you report this?
Colette Roth: No. They said they'd kill him if I did. That's why I was trying to find him the next day - to see if they'd let him go. But they killed him. The ruffians killed him.
Beckett: Mm-hmm. And...where did this all happen?
Colette Roth: On the street for all to see.
Beckett: K.
In the tech room.
Ryan: Corner of Washington and Greenwich ATM cam. This is where Colette said the abduction went down, but I've been over it and there's nothing.
Beckett: All right. Unless you guys are enjoying the Warhol-esque quality of this, we can just shut it down. I'm gonna go and check on Esposito, see where he's at with Colette's alibi.
Castle: Wait. There's Bailey.
Ryan: And here comes Colette.
In the video, Colette jumps into Bailey's arms and he spins her around.
Beckett: Seriously?
A car pulls up in the video and a ski-masked man jumps out and grabs Bailey.
Castle: Whoa. Ruffians in ski masks.
Beckett: You gotta be kidding me.
Colette tries to fight the ruffians and she elbows one in the face.
Ryan: Oh! Looks like Colette just broke that ruffian's nose.
The ruffian pushes Colette away and gets in the car, which takes off.
Castle: Fake ID...bricks of cash...brazen abduction...He really was Jason Bourne!
Beckett: You gotta be kidding me.
Near the bullpen.
Castle: Can't you see it? Bailey is in covert ops. They placed him at a giant, multinational company, Global Twelve Consolidated, as a cover. Then, a month ago, they activated him. They give him an alias. You know, back story. They give him unlimited walking around money. And then, somehow, the enemy gets to him. They grab him off the streets. He manages to escape, so they exploit his Achilles heel. His love of beautiful women. They send in a super sexy secret agent, she seduces him, and then kills him by feeding him a poison protein shake.
Castle raises his eyebrows at Beckett and she scrunches up her nose.
Beckett: I can't think of anything better.
Beckett slaps her knee in frustration. Her cell rings.
Beckett: Beckett… Really? Okay, thank you… The CIA, the FBI, and the DHS have never heard of Bailey or his alias.
Castle: Do you really think they'd tell you if they did?
Ryan enters.
Ryan: Hey, tech just got the plate number off the kidnappers car.
Beckett: I thought that the plates weren't visible on the ATM footage.
Ryan: Ah, they weren't. But I found a traffic cam up the block where they were. Car is registered to a Pablo Barnes, 28, insurance salesman.
Castle: That's probably a cover, too.
Beckett: Did you get an address?
Ryan: Sure did.
Beckett: All right, let's go.
They get up to leave.
Beckett: Where's Espo?
Ryan: In the break room trying to score his plus one.
Beckett: Espo! Let's go!
Esposito looks up at Beckett and his hand splits on the espresso machine, spraying his potential plus one with steamed milk. The cop squeals in surprise and Esposito hands her a napkin on his way out.
Esposito: Sorry. I gotta… I gotta go.
In Adbuctors' apartment.
Esposito: I was this close to getting my plus one.
Castle: Hey, relax, man. It happens to a lot of guys. You get a little exited, lose control of your steamer.
Esposito pauses awkwardly as they reach the door. Ryan and Beckett flank the two sides and Esposito kicks in the door. Ryan runs in first.
Ryan: NYPD! Let me see your hands right now!
Beckett: NYPD!
Esposito: Don't move! Don't move!
There are two couples in the apartment, Pablo with a woman whose shirt is open, and a broken-nosed guy (Max Landon) and another woman both dressed in bath towels.
Open-Shirt Woman: What the hell Pablo?
Beckett: Pablo Barnes?
Pablo Barnes: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Please, don't shoot.
Max Landon: I don't know what you're doing here, but we didn't do anything.
Ryan: Broken nose, other masked man.
Beckett: Espo, get him, too.
Esposito: Turn around!
Max puts his hands on his head and turns around.
Max Landon: Uh, seriously, I don't know why you… You guys have the wrong people… Ah. Officer, ah! Ah! Does it have to be that tight? It's very… Ow!
Castle: Hey…. Bolero.
Beckett hears it, too.
Castle: Just like in the hotel.
Pablo leans toward the open-shirt woman as Ryan cuffs him.
Pablo Barnes: See? I told you we were badass.
In the interrogation room 1, Beckett slaps a photo of the ATM abduction footage on the table.
Beckett: That's your car, Pablo. What were you and Bailey up to and why did you kill him?
Pablo Barnes: Wait, are… Are you telling me Mike's dead?
Beckett: Cut the act, Pablo. We know you kidnapped him two days ago. Why?
Pablo Barnes: Uh, no, no! I--it's not what it looks like. It's an ex-stalk-tion.
In the interrogation room 2.
Esposito: Ex-stalk-a-what?
Max Landon: Mike's our buddy. He got involved with this crazy stalker chick, Colette Something. So, we staged an abduction to scare her off. We call it an ex-stalk-tion.
Ryan: Are you saying Bailey was in on it?
Max Landon: Yeah! The three of us are a crew.
In the interrogation room 1.
Beckett: What kind of crew?
Castle: Special Forces? Private military contractors?
Pablo Barnes: We're pickup artists.
Castle: As in...picking up women?
Pablo Barnes: Mm-hmm.
Beckett: You?
Pablo shrugs.
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: We dedicate our lives to picking up as many hot women as possible.
Ryan: That would explain all of Bailey's women.
Esposito: Those girls at the apartment were pretty hot.
Max Landon: Yeah.
In the interrogation room 1.
Castle: That music that was playing, is that part of your seduction strategy?
Pablo Barnes: Oh, yeah. Bolero increases the chance of closing the deal about 12%.
Beckett: Okay, assuming that you are telling the truth, you were with Mike the night before he was killed. Did he tell you what he was up to?
Pablo Barnes: No. He was being all secretive. I mean, he stopped hanging out with us, like, a month ago.
Castle: Really? A month?
Castle and Beckett exchange a look.
Pablo Barnes: Yeah, when he called about the ex-stalk-tion a couple days ago, that was the first time we've heard from him since then.
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: So, when he said he was going out after the ex-stalk-tion, naturally we followed him.
Esposito: Where'd he go?
Max Landon: It was this totally lame bar, The Magic Bottle. I mean, not target rich at all.
In the interrogation room 1.
Pablo Barnes: Oh, and when he found us there, he kinda freaked. But he agreed to let us stay and be his wingmen, but only if we referred to him as... Jake, like he was under cover.
Castle: Jake. That's the same identity that he gave to Holly Franklin the next day.
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: So, we do our usual couple laps of recon. Actually some pretty decent MILFs.
In the interrogation room 1.
Pablo Barnes: And I think Mike's just expanding his pallet, right? But he wasn't interested in any of them.
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: No. Instead, he finds this one mark, like, ugh, nothing special... And plants his flag.
In the interrogation room 1.
Pablo Barnes: Then I see that she's got a ring on her finger. She's a married chick. We stay away from married chicks.
Beckett: 'Cause you're so ethical.
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: No. They're just trouble. But he doesn't care. He's all in on her.
In the interrogation room 1.
Castle: So, you think he went to this bar for this particular woman, like he was targeting her?
Pablo Barnes: Exactly.
Beckett: Did he say why?
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: No. But he was working her like his life depended on it. I mean, it was like he was on a mission.
Ryan: Did she go for him?
In the interrogation room 1.
Pablo Barnes: No. Total red light. Boopoopoo! Date's down, train's comin', time to move on. But not Mike. Not on this night.
Castle: So, what'd he do?
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: He counters with some authorizing.
Esposito: "Authorizing", huh?
Esposito is taking notes.
Max Landon: You know, making it seem the last thing on his mind is hooking up. Nah, he just finds her "interesting" and wants to talk.
In the interrogation room 1.
Pablo Barnes: But she doesn't bite. So, he tries an M-swig: Tells her he knows this girl who's cheating on his friend, should he tell his friend?
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: 'Cause women love to give advice. But she's still giving him the Heisman, so he tries a butter job.
Esposito: A "butter job", what's that?
Max Landon: It's when you flirt with the mark's friend.
Esposito takes notes and looks sideways at Ryan who motions to him about the note taking.
In the interrogation room 1.
Pablo Barnes: And that's when he started getting traction. Immediately follows with a yang and chain reversal, sees he's got her on the hook...
In the interrogation room 2.
Max Landon: So, he goes right for the Bailey ultimatum. Boom! Signature move. Says he has to leave, forcing the mark to make a quick decision whether to go with you or not.
Max smirks and puffs out a breath, and the padding stuffed up his broken nose splats on the table.
In the interrogation room 1.
Castle: And what'd she do?
Pablo Barnes: The next thing you know, two of them are walking on their way outta there.
Pablo looks at Beckett.
Pablo Barnes: You know, you have some beautiful eyes.
Beckett: Seriously?
Pablo Barnes: What? It's a numbers game. I strike out 90% of the time.
Beckett: That's restoring my faith in my gender. So, this mark that he was working, does she have a name?
Pablo Barnes: Lisa… The greatest pickup I have ever seen. It's a damn shame she'll never make it into Mike's ledger.
Beckett: What ledger?
Near the bullpen, [Castle flips through Mike's "ledger".
Castle: It's literally hundreds of women that Bailey slept with.
Beckett: Or so he claims.
Esposito: Seems legit to me. Most of these shots are pretty racy.
Esposito leans in close to see the ledger over Castle's shoulder.
Castle: All with nicknames and dates. "June 9, 2010 Carnal Carrie. June 12, 2010 Mesmerizing Marjan."
Esposito: Mmm.
Castle turns his head and backs away from Esposito's face.
Castle: Whoa.
Esposito: Sorry.
Beckett: Is there a Lisa in there from two days ago?
Castle: Uh, no. Uh, the last entry was over a month ago. So, Pablo was right; she didn't make it in.
Beckett: We gotta find Lisa; she could be our other woman.
Ryan: Hey. So, our friends Max and Pablo just alibied out. They were both at work when Mike was poisoned.
Castle: "Limber Lucy"? And boy is she ever.
Esposito looks at the photo of the flexible woman.
Esposito: I don't know what this dude Bailey was into, but whatever it is he had it going on.
Ryan: Really? This impresses you? These women are pathetic for falling for this guy. And Bailey? Bailey was just a--a con man and a liar.
Beckett: Thank you. At least there is one real man amongst us.
Castle has a light bulb moment and closes Mike's ledger.
Beckett: Ryan, why don't you take this situation down to The Magic Bottle and see if we can get an ID on Lisa. And find out why Bailey might've been targeting her.
Ryan and Esposito leave.
Castle: Beckett, when exactly did Ryan and Jenny start dating?
Beckett: Mm, I think it was around 2009. She got him that ugly tie for their two week anniversary. So, I think Easter April.
Castle: Meaning, by May 2009, they'd been dating a month.
Beckett: Yeah. Why?
Castle: Bailey's May 20, 2009 entry.
Castle flips the book around to show Beckett.
Beckett: Oh, my gosh. That's Jenny.
Castle: Not just Jenny. "Gyrating Jenny".
At the Magic Bottle.
Bartender: Yeah, I recognize him. In here with a couple of friends two nights ago.
Ryan: Those friends told us that he left with a woman, Lisa, do you know her?
Esposito is making eyes at a young woman at a booth.
Bartender: Yeah. She's a regular.
Esposito: Does she have a last name?
Bartender: Give me a sec.
The bartender walks down the counter.
Esposito: I think I like this place, partner.
Ryan: Dude, you're a cop. This is a Midtown bar. Women here, they're looking for lawyers and bankers.
Esposito: I bank.
Ryan chuckles.
Ryan: Well, you are on your own. I'm getting married on Sunday.
Esposito: Exactly. So, this is your last chance to be my wingman, help me get a plus one. I think I'm gonna try an M-swig.
Ryan: Dude, you can't be serious.
Esposito: What, are you thinking butter job?
The bartender returns.
Bartender: I checked credit card slips from the other night. Her name's Lisa Hill.
Ryan: Lisa Hill.
Ryan writes the name down on his notepad.
In the break room.
Beckett: So, not only is Lisa Hill married, she is also an heiress, daughter to Stephanie Dashby.
Castle: Of Dashby Publishing?
Beckett: Which puts her at Forbes Top 400.
Castle: Bailey was hunting big game. He knew he couldn't close the deal as a junior analyst, that's why he used the alias with her. Same way he used it with big shot lawyer Holly Franklin.
Beckett: Yeah, well, according to her maid, Lisa Hill packed up and left her apartment for her house in Montauk at 6:30 PM.
Castle: Half an hour after our kill zone.
Beckett: Plus, she also had easy access to our poison. Her sister owns a drug company that manufactures it.
Castle: This is about the money. Bailey only used the Jake identity with Holly and Lisa. They're both rich.
Beckett: So, what are you thinking? An extortion plot?
Castle: Bricks of cash, probably from previous successes.
Beckett: He targets wealthy women, tries to put them in compromising situations...
Castle: And then makes them pay their way out.
Beckett: Except Lisa Hill wouldn't pay.
Castle: We need to get her in here.
Beckett: And we will. First thing in the morning.
They prepare to leave.
Castle: So...what are we gonna do?
Beckett: About what?
Castle: Well, we have to tell Ryan about Jenny.
Beckett: What? Why? Castle, if we were getting married, would you want to know about all the guys that I've slept with?
Castle: All?
Beckett: Seriously? You sign women's chests at book readings, you cannot be shocked that I'm not a virgin.
Castle: Eh, it's just the word... "All" suggests... A lot. How many are we talking... Exactly?
Beckett: Are you really asking for my number?
Castle: You show me yours, I'll show you mine.
Beckett: Men. you all want to know, but you don't want to know. Listen, every woman has her secrets, including Jenny. And sometimes, for the sake of a relationship, it is better not to share.
Beckett takes her bag and leaves and Castle thinks over what she said.
At Castle’s loft.
Castle: Wow. That is some dress.
Martha: Isn't she stunning?
Alexis: After striking out all day, we finally tried JDFs on Madison.
Martha: And boy, did we score!
Castle: That sounds like it's about more than just a dress.
Martha: Well, not only did Alexis find this exquisite little number, we were completely charmed by the proprietor, John Danton Farnsworth.
Castle: JDF.
Alexis: So, as we're paying, Mr. Farnsworth is about to close up when his grandson, John Danton Farnsworth the Third, picked him up for dinner. Goes by JD. So cute.
Martha: Oh, he is a lovely young man. Freshman at Columbia.
Alexis: Which I'm applying to. So, of course, I grilled him about it.
Martha: And the next thing you know, they invite us to join them for dinner.
Castle: So, who was the wingman, the grandpa or the kid?
Martha: The what?
Alexis: Dad. They were total gentlemen. They even invited us to their family's annual charity event, a private concert with Lady Gaga.
Castle: Oh!
Alexis: But it's the same time as the wedding.
Castle: Oh.
Alexis: I know I promised, and of course I'll go if you want me to. It's just...this is the first time I've felt this way since Ashley, and...
Castle holds up a hand.
Castle: You don't have to go to the wedding. You are released from your plus one duties.
Alexis: Thanks, Dad.
Castle: Which, I guess, means you don't need this dress.
Martha: Don't be silly, darling. It is a black tie benefit.
Alexis: Yeah.
Martha: And after dinner, John opened the shop and...
Martha fetches a shopping bag.
Martha: I got one, too.
Castle: So, it's a win-win.
In the precinct.
Esposito: I can't believe you bailed on me.
Ryan: We were there until 2:30 in the morning.
Esposito: Yeah, I was five minutes from sealing the deal with my plus one.
Ryan: You really think after standing there for three hours another five minutes of me standing there would've made any difference?
Esposito: Yeah. She was into me.
Ryan: She said that she thought solving murders was "cute".
Esposito: Well, you didn't have to tell her friend you were engaged.
Ryan: Oh, no, no, you're right, I could've totally just--just lied to her and hooked up with her. And do you have to be such a cliché? Stuffing your face with that… That… That… That thing?
Ryan tries to slap away the doughnut in Esposito's hand.
Esposito: Hey, don't touch my doughnut.
Ryan tries to go for the doughnut again and jumps on Esposito's back.
Ryan: …
Ryan and Esposito struggle. Beckett and Castle enter as Esposito stuffs the doughnut in his mouth.
Castle: Hey, hey, hey! Break it up!
Beckett: Guys! What the hell's going on?
Esposito: Talk to hunger strike over here.
Ryan: He was flaunting that doughnut.
Esposito: I was eating it.
Beckett: Ryan, you okay? Cleanse for nine days? Don't you think it's time to let it go?
Ryan: No, no. I'm… I'm fine. I'm… I'm sorry, everybody. Sorry, bro.
Ryan drinks his lime cleansing juice.
Esposito: So, any luck finding Lisa Hill?
Beckett: Yeah, we tracked her down at a spa in Montauk.
Castle: Yeah, she's going from mud wrap to murder rap. Exfoliation to interrogation. Manicure to manacles. Shiatsu to... Shiatsu...
Castle tries to think of a play on words.
Beckett: Unis are on their way to pick her up now.
In the interrogation.
Beckett: Do you recognize him, Ms. Hill?
Becket places Michael Bailey's photo on the table.
Lisa Hill: Yes. It's Jake.
Beckett: Yes, Jake Hendricks. Or so you thought until you found out his real name was Michael Bailey and he was trying to blackmail you, isn't that right?
Lisa Hill: Blackmail? I don't know what you're talking about.
Beckett: I think you do. You realized that you had been played and you decided to take your revenge. Your sister owns a, um, a drug company? She must've given you the coltrasine you used to poison him, didn't she?
Lisa Hill: No. Look, I didn't get revenge because I never knew what he was up to. But he was up to something. I should've realized when he was hitting on me so hard at the bar, but he was cute and my husband is more interested in work than actually living. So, I brought him home, and it was nice. But then I came out of the bathroom and caught him on the computer. I figured he was trying to steal credit cards, banking info, so I kicked his ass out. But I swear that was the last time I saw him.
In the tech room.
Eposito: Oh, yeah. Bailey sent an e-mail all right. To himself.
Beckett: Why would he e-mail himself?
Eposito: Because he attached several documents from Hill's computer.
Castle: What kind of documents.
Eposito: Confidential ones.
Esposito opens one of the files on the screen.
Eposito: Relating to KPW mining corporation. Lisa Hill's husband Ron Hill is the investment banker representing KPW in the possible sale of the company.
Esposito pulls up Ron's photo.
Castle: That's Lisa Hill's husband? We saw him at the Global Twelve offices.
Eposito: Yep. And Ron Hill is representing KPW. It's a multibillion dollar deal.
Castle: So, Bailey was engaged in covert ops. He targeted Ron Hill's wife, Lisa, slept with her in order to steal KPW corporate secrets.
Beckett: That's espionage.
Castle: More like sexpionage.
Beckett: More like motive.
Near the bullpen.
Castle: So, Bailey was using his pickup artist skills to sleep with Ron Hill's wife and steal corporate secrets. That has a "penetrating enemy lines" joke here somewhere.
Beckett: You know, Ron must have hit the roof when he discovered that those files were stolen.
Castle: Well, sure. Ron got screwed on the deal. And his wife got screwed. But if anybody ever had a motive for murder, it was Ron Hill.
Eposito: Yeah, except he was in negotiations during the poisoning kill zone, and his wife Lisa alibied, too.
Ryan: And I've been looking at the KPW deal, turns out that they're represented by Keller, Braun, and Franklin. Guess who their lead attorney is?
Beckett: Holly Franklin?
Ryan: Yep. Miss No Tell Hotel herself. The only reason you guys didn't run into her at Global Twelve Consolidated is that we're still holding her.
Beckett: That explains the Lisa and Holly connection.
Castle: Yeah, but it begs the question, "How many other women did Bailey target in this little sexpionage scheme?"
Beckett: All right, you guys get a list of all the people at KPW that were working the sale, including the banking and legal teams.
Esposito: All right.
Ryan and Esposito leave.
Beckett: There's no way that Bailey was working this alone. He's too junior.
Castle: And besides, he was on leave.
Beckett: And who authorized the leave?
In the interrogation room.
Seth Harris: Yes, I authorized his leave.
Beckett: You gave him a fake ID and cash bonuses, Mr. Harris.
Seth Harris: I already told you I don't know anything about that.
Beckett: Okay. Well, how about this? Bailey slept with Holly Franklin and Ron Hill's wife, Lisa, to steal KPW secrets for your negotiations. Do you know about that?
Harris shrugs and shakes his head in innocence.
Castle: Oh, come on, Harris. This couldn't be Bailey's idea. You're his boss, and you're Global Twelve Consolidated's lead negotiator for the KPW deal. So, how did it start? D'you happen to see Bailey out one night at some bar, working his magic, realize that you could use his ability to your advantage?
Seth Harris: This is nothing but wild speculation. You have no proof whatsoever of any wrongdoing on my part or Global Twelve.
Beckett: Look, I don't care about corporate malfeasance, I want Michael Bailey's killer.
Seth Harris: And how do you think I can help?
Beckett: You tell me where he's been staying for the past month. Tell me who else was targeted, and who he was with the day that he was killed.
Seth Harris: Unless you're actually gonna charge me with something...
Harris stands up.
Seth Harris: I'm leaving.
In the conference room.
Beckett: There are more than 300 female executives at KPW. Bailey could have targeted any one of them.
Castle: Not to mention all the women at the law firm and the investment bank who also working on the deal.
Beckett: And we still have no idea where he was poisoned.
Esposito enters.
Esposito: Any luck?
Beckett: No. There's too big a pool of possible marks that Bailey could have slept with.
Esposito: Yeah, uh... Speaking of that. You know... Ryan's my boy, so I gotta tell him about Jenny and Bailey.
Beckett gives Castle a look.
Castle: You only told me I couldn't tell Ryan.
Beckett: Look, Espo, I appreciate your point of view, but the guy hasn't eaten in a week and a half, and after that doughnut incident, I don't…
Ryan enters and stares at the Chinese food sitting on the table. He gingerly picks up a file.
Ryan: I'll just take these back to my desk.
Esposito: Sit down, bro.
Ryan: What? What?
Ryan sits.
Ryan: Why do you guys look so serious?
Esposito: You should... Eat something.
Beckett: Yeah. Look hungry. You've got the posture of a feral cat.
Ryan: Guys, I made a sacred vow to the woman I love...
Castle moves a takeout box towards Ryan.
Ryan: Is that Mushu pork?
Esposito continues chowing down the food.
Esposito: Yes. It is delicious. Come on, bro, just eat.
Ryan grabs the food from Castle and digs in, groaning in pleasure.
Ryan:... This Mushu pork. Come on!
Esposito: Right?
Ryan: Would you pass the spring rolls, please?
Esposito: Yeah. So...
Esposito passes the box.
Esposito: You know how we all love Jenny, right?
Ryan: Yeah, what about her?
Esposito: Well, it's just that...that ledger of Bailey's...
Ryan: Hey, is she in that? I've been meaning to ask, but I have been having these--these memory lapses. Mm, pass the fried rice?
Castle: Yeah.
Castle hands Ryan the box.
Castle: So, you've known all along?
Ryan: No. I was telling Jenny about Javi's antics last night.
Beckett gives Esposito a look.
Ryan: And we got to talking about the case, and she told me that she met Bailey at a bar a month or so after we started out.
Esposito: She told you about that?
Ryan: Yeah. She had no idea that he was some kind of professional pickup artist.
Castle: And you're not upset at all?
Ryan: I… Um... It's not like we were exclusive. Mm, is that Mongolian beef?
Beckett smiles at Esposito and Castle's reactions. A female officer hands Ryan a note.
Uniform: Here you go.
Ryan: Thanks, Di.
Ryan reads the note.
Ryan: Oh! Get this. So, I've been trying to figure out where else Bailey might've been staying for the past month, and when we got onto his corporate spying for Global Twelve Consolidated, I looked into their corporate housing.
Beckett: That's… A great idea.
Castle: Yeah. Why didn't I think of that?
Ryan: Turns out Mike Bailey has been checked into the Oaks on Park Avenue for the last month under his alias, Jake Hendricks.
Beckett: Well, what are you sitting around for?
Ryan gets up and hesitates as he reaches back for some food.
Ryan: Uh, do you mind if I take a spare?
Castle hands Ryan a takeout box.
In Bailey's room.
Manager: You're welcome to look, but we got the call yesterday Mr. Hendricks wasn't coming back.
Esposito: What'd you do with all his stuff?
Manager: Per his company's instructions, we gave his clothes and personal belongings to Good Will, and the place has been scrubbed, bedding laundered.
Esposito and Ryan inspect the room. Ryan looks for a nod from the manager before opening the fridge.
Ryan: Hey, Javier, check this out, "Chocolate Blast". It's a protein shake, "made with way protein isolate".
Esposito: You always stock this drink?
Manager: Yeah, it's all standard.
Ryan: It's exactly what Lanie said that Bailey had in his system that delivered the coltrasine.
Esposito: This is where he was poisoned, bro.
Near the bullpen.
Beckett: Looks like we found the murder weapon. Lanie says that the chocolate shake from The Oaks is a perfect match for the contents of Bailey's stomach. It's what delivered the lethal dose of coltrasine.
Esposito and Ryan enter.
Esposito: Yo. So, the doorman at The Oaks confirms that Bailey was there during the whole poisoning time window. He asked not to be disturbed.
Castle: Yeah, I bet. Because sexpionage can be so much more demanding than espionage.
Beckett: So, I'm guessing he had a visitor?
Ryan: Yep. Someone who had been there a few times before. Security cam photo capture.
Ryan hands Castle the photo. He hands it to Beckett with a sly grin.
Castle: Look familiar?
Beckett's shocked.
At the Global Twelve Consolidated.
Ron Hill: If we could focus on the third quarter, I believe that would be the most productive way to move forward.
Beckett knocks as she and Castle enter.
Beckett: Excuse me. Sorry to interrupt again.
Amy Kemp: What's up, Seth?
Seth Harris: Nothing. Nothing at all. Look, Detective, I have already told you everything that I know about Michael Bailey. Now, please leave.
Beckett: Actually, we're not here for you, Mr. Harris.
Castle: That would be the SEC, soon.
Beckett: Today we are here for a woman.
Beckett walks past a nervous looking Holly Franklin.
Beckett: Someone who works for KPW and also knew Michael Bailey. Your COO, Amy Kemp. You're under arrest for the murder of Michael Bailey.
Amy Kemp: Pleasure doing business with you, Seth.
Kemp stands calmly.
Beckett: Let's go.
Officer Velasquez escorts Amy Kemp down the hall in cuffs.
Castle: She said "killing him was just business". He had to die to protect the corporate secrets.
Beckett: Yeah, I guess the fact that he won't be around to dupe other women was an added benefit. Bailey worked her like all the other women. Made her feel special, got her to fall for him, but somewhere along the way, she figured out what he was up to.
Ryan: I'm just glad I'm out of the game.
Castle: The games are only beginning for you, my friend.
Beckett: Hey, so what's up with your plus one?
Esposito: Oh, it's on. That's all I'm saying.
Beckett and Castle exchange a look.
Esposito stands with a gorgeous woman taller than he is Lanie enters with her doctor date.
Esposito: Lanie, hey.
Lanie: Hello, Javier. This is Toby.
Dr. Toby Lang: Pleased to meet you.
Esposito: Yeah, you too. This is Jody.
Lanie: Nice to meet you.
Jody: Pleasure. Excuse me, I need to find the ladies' room.
Lanie watches Jody saunter off.
Dr. Toby Lang: Um, you two talk. I'll get us seats.
Lanie: Thank you, Toby.
Esposito: Toby, huh?
Lanie: What do you mean, "Toby, huh"?
Esposito: I don't know, you tell me.
Lanie: You and I broke up two months ago. So, unless you thought I'd joined a convent, you need to take a step back.
Esposito: So, you two serious now?
Lanie: Yeah, we're serious. About dancing. That's why his boyfriend let me borrow him. Besides, I figured I'd need somebody to keep my company while you flirted with all of Jenny's sorority sisters.
Esposito: Toby's boyfriend?
Lanie: And I seem to recall you here with the center for the New York Liberty.
Esposito: She's my cousin. I heard you were coming with a date, so I thought I had to have somebody...you look great, you know.
Lanie: Yeah, I know.
Esposito: Can I show you to your seat?
Lanie: That would be nice.
Lanie takes Esposito's arm and they enter the church. Castle enters the narthex alone and Beckett notices and breaks off her conversation.
Beckett: Castle. You look like a lost puppy, where's your date?
Castle: At a Lady Gaga concert with a teenage boy. How do I compete with that?
Beckett: Oh, no, I'm sorry.
Castle: Yeah, me too. I hate going to weddings alone.
Beckett: Well, maybe we could be each other's plus one.
Castle: Yeah! And then avoid the stigma of sitting at the singles' table. Yes, that would be nice. I would like th…
Castle smiles as he catches sight of Ryan. Ryan walks over, beaming.
Beckett: Oh, look at him. He looks so happy.
Beckett snaps a photo.
Ryan: Hey! I'm so glad you're here.
Beckett: Where else are we gonna be?
Beckett gives Ryan a hug and a kiss.
Beckett: You look fantastic.
Esposito: Yeah, we clean up pretty nice, huh?
Jenny and her bridesmaids look down on them from the stairs.
Castle: Oh, Jenny, you look amazing.
Jenny: Thank you, Rick.
Ryan starts to turn.
Beckett: No.
Beckett grabs him to stop him turning around.
Beckett: No, no, no, no, no, you can't see her.
Ryan: Right.
Ryan makes a blinders motion and stays forward.
Castle: Kevin, you are a lucky man.
Ryan: Don't I know it.
Esposito: Ready, bro?
Ryan: I think so.
Beckett: Okay, we're gonna see you in there.
Beckett gives Ryan a shove down the aisle and Esposito follows him in.
Castle: You know, I gotta say, I kind of envy him.
Beckett: Well, who knows, Castle. Maybe third time's a charm.
Castle: Yeah. Could be. Shall we?
Beckett: Yeah.
Beckett takes Castle's arm and they walks down the aisle.
